On yesterday's Top Five at 5, I discussed HOT GIRLS WHO ARE OBVIOUSLY BITCHES.

I like that. Truth in packaging.

Remember HEATHER THOMAS, star of the TV series "The Fall Guy"? Bikini shot after bikini shot. Did one of the most famous posters of the '80s (see below). Might have been the hottest woman on the planet. But look at her. You'd conclude - rightly or wrongly - she was a BITCH. Similar to Jane, her character in the movie "Zapped!" Jane's top kept flying open. It was NICE.

Looking at the present day, numero uno is Christina Aguilera: Obviously high-maintenance. Lindsay Lohan: Bitch with a capital C. Khloe Kardashian: Even more than her sisters. Selena Gomez, everybody's barely-legal queen: She drove Justin Bieber to drug use.

What you see is what you get. Not just with celebrity smokeshows, either. Lots of "normal" girls might as well be tattooed with a bar code that reads BITCH. Especially hot high school girls. At no other time is the worship level that high.

Heather Thomas' attributes are on display in this clip from "Zapped!", which also features screen legends SCOTT BAIO and WILLIE AAMES. The top flies open at 2:57.

Photo courtesy of Youtube.com.